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Once upon a time.... many years ago......my wife and I were
members of a cult.
I have documented elsewhere on this site how our great and
merciful God allowed His glorious grace to shine upon us, and how
we came to see that Justification really is by faith
alone. (We are now in our 11th year after leaving the
WCG).
I have also documented elsewhere how I commenced a theology
degree shortly afterwards, culminating in a very good level degree in 1998. By
now we considered ourselves Independent Evangelicals
(which we still consider ourselves). Our full Testimony can be
found HERE.
By 1997 I was preaching, mostly in rather neglected and
pastorless congregations and mostly Baptist Union of Great
Britain affiliated.
It was, as I recall, in 1997 or 1998 that I met the serving
'Baptist Union Superintendent' (at that particular time) for the South Wales
area. I went to this man's home and we had a long discussion. He
seemed (at least initially) quite impressed by me and told me
that he felt I would make a good baptist pastor. He then
explained the complications of my position. My situation was
difficult because I did not have a long baptist history and no
particular congregation had forwarded me as a prospective
minister in the normal fashion.
This meant that I would need to start out as an 'unnaccredited
minister', but upon acceptance by a congregation, I was told that
I could apply for "full accreditation" within, I think it was, about two
years.
We also discussed the fact that not all Baptist Union
congregations were Bible-believing evangelical congregations -
indeed many were liberal - but that an appropriate congregation
could surely be found for me.
My preaching regularity was very patchy: I can recall preaching
three sermons on the same day on one Pentecost Sunday, but at
other times I only seemed to be preaching once or twice a month
which was highly frustrating. For about a year after my meeting
with the Baptist Union Superintendent, he would suggest me to
various congregations as a preacher who might consider taking up
a pastorate.
In truth, many of these congregations had been seriously affected
by liberal theology and I think that not a few of them were
somewhat astonished at having a passionate, Bible-believing
preacher! I soon found a typical reaction: the congregations loved me,
but the leaders (by which I mean the deacons since many of these
places had no serving pastor) were less enthusiastic. This did
not entirely surprise me since the leaders of those congregations
had presumably presided over that congregation's descent into the
sad, lifeless and apathetic liberalism which I so frequently
encountered! Some of these congregations were down to as few as
ten people, while others were much larger. Constantly I found
that the need for leadership was huge, but often a leading deacon
seemed to hold back the possibility of taking on a new pastor
because of what seemed to me as a fear of the fresh
approach, impetus and challenge which any incoming pastor would provide.
In truth, some of these places of worship appeared to be either
spiritually dead, or perilously close to spiritual death and I
found myself comparing many of them to the church of
Sardis! (Revelation 3:1-6).
A few things really astonished me: Often I was the first one to arrive when due to give a sermon, quite often too the "leaders" did not even show up until two or three miniutes before the service start time - and quite often two or three minutes after the start time! I also was somewhat amazed that a congregation in which fewer than twenty peoople were regularly showing up, very frequently actually had around a hundred plus "official" members!
After a while, such struggling little church congregations no
longer seemed to ring me, but that was fine by me since - around
the same time - I was beginning to see that God was just not
calling me to pastor in the Baptist Union of Great Britain. I was again feeling
increasingly Independent Evangelical, rather than
specifically 'Baptist,' and the appalling watery indifference of the local leaders whom I came into contact with was a constant surprise and disappointment.
It was appearing that if a door ever
opened to me to be an active pastor, the door would open into an
independent Baptist or independent evangelical congregation,
since the very constituition of many Baptist Union churches would
prevent them taking on a non-accredited pastor. Nevertheless I made a
determined decision at that time to withdraw from preaching in 'Baptist Union'
congregations.
However, I decided to ask the local B.U. 'super' why he had
apparently stopped recommending me, since new invitations had dried up (of course, I still regularly preached in a few non-BUGB places where I had become known), this man's reaction astonished me!
This man had been (quite obviously) speaking to one or two of the
deacons in some of the liberal congregations where I had tried
very hard to raise a spark of commitment to Christ. He said,
"I am told that you are just not speaking to some of these
congregations on their level of understanding!" - the only
way I could read this was that this was a euphemistic phrase
which simply meant 'You are preaching Bible-believing type
sermons in liberal churches!' But I was disappointed that he
had formed a conclusion without even speaking to me when he had
earlier encouraged me to look upon him as a friend.
Of course, as a local Baptist Union 'super,' he had to consider
the needs of liberal as well as evangelical congregations. I have
always been an intense, passionate and somewhat fiery preacher
and I know that I have made a mark in many places - however,
liberal places of worship undoubtedly felt disturbingly
challenged by some of my sermons. The congregations in these places had enjoyed hearing me preach but, as already mentioned, the leaders did not seem to suddenly want the challenge of a preacher who pointed congregations back to a closer walk with Christ.
Around 2002 my health started to deteriorate and I had a mild heart attack in the Februrary of that year. About this time I started to
wonder whether my health would really be up to pastoring a
church. The final straw which made me withdraw from the
'pastor required' scene was when I was invited to preach
in a struggling little congregation at Havant in Hampshire,
England (in this case an independent 'Free Church' - nothing to do with the
Baptist Union of Great Britain and Ireland). This was not
(or so I had been assured) a liberal congregation. I drove down to
Havant (a distance of around 125 miles from where I live) on a
foggy and unwelcoming winter Sunday. I seem to remember that
there was a problem on the motorway and I had to slightly change
my route; meanwhile driving in the fog was an absolute
nightmare!
.
Yet I still managed to reach the meeting hall about 40 minutes
before the service was due to start (I was always an 'early bird'), and I was so disappointed
that the deacon, whom I had already contacted by both telephone and e mail, had
not decided to come to the meeting hall a bit earlier because of
the uncertainty of my arrival time; it seemed tough, and frankly very unthoughtful, that after
driving such a distance in such poor weather there was nobody
around to greet me! This just seemed so disappointingly
inconsiderate.
My first view of the worship hall already made a bad impression:
it was a 1950s/1960s modernish-type type building and the place was seriously in need of seeing a coat of paint. The
window (surprisingly shaped rather like a typical British
shop-front) looked very dirty, with no 'church notices' obviously
having been placed there for some time. Here was a very bad
impression to be giving to any would-be attenders; but it got
worse: the hall had about four steps which had to be negotiated
in order to reach the door, one of these had completely broken
away so that any older person with a walking difficulty would
never even be able to reach the door! I seemed to find such
things constantly during this period: churches which were
crying out for new people not being prepared to do just that
little bit to make such people welcome!!
The deacon and his wife finally arrived with just minutes to go
until the service start time (always a very bad sign, yet I
encountered this so often during my 'prospective pastor' period).
But I was surprised that the deacon and his wife were unfriendly
towards me - this seemed very odd! Surely since we were all 'in
the faith' and committed to the Lord Jesus I might have expected
something like, 'Good morning my dear brother! Thank you so
much for driving all this way in such awful weather in order to
bring us the Word!' But I got nothing like that, just a
polite handshake and the deacon's wife did not seem to want to
talk at all. Already I felt that I knew rather a lot about this
congregation.
The sermon seemed to go okay, though nobody made any comments on
it, but I think it was possibly the strongest one I was giving at that time. Then I was invited back for a meal to a member's home at
which the deacon was also to be present (I had already decided to
only take the morning service on what I assumed would be just the
first of other such occasions). But the deacon spoiled my meal by
continually making remarks regarding what he felt was my
unsuitability for the pastorate. I was a little annoyed about
this since this was occurring at the dinner table in front of
several people and I felt that his insinuations of my
unsuitability were more suited to any future meeting between
myself and the few leading members. So at a time when I expected
just to be able to relax and enjoy a meal in pleasant Christian
fellowship, I felt seriously 'under attack' with my credentials
'under fire' (although I honestly believe that those credentials
were rather more than any tiny, struggling church could
reasonably expect to find in any incoming pastor!) In fact, by
this time the Lord had already clearly shown me that this
pastorate was just not for me. This man's behaviour genuinely
shocked me; he seemed to be treating me with the disdain of a man
who believed himself in a position of strength. That is, the
impression he was giving was that potential pastors were just
forming a queue to be considered. The truth was quite the
opposite: I think I was more or less their last chance - it is
hard to believe that anybody would want to pastor such a place!
As I recall, only a half-stipend, or half salary
was even being offered which would probably rule out 95% of pastors
from even considering it.When I had learned this my attitude
was, 'Well, I'm not in this for the money anyway! I will still
meet them and see if the Lord will open a door'- but this door
wasn't only shut but the Lord had allowed somebody to drive a
nail firmly into it!
Some others present at the meal also seemed a bit shocked and
annoyed at this deacon's discourteous treatment of me, and
he was finally quite openly challenged about his attitude towards
me by a retired pastor who was present whom I had quickly
established some rapport with. My! I was learning a lot about
why this little congregation was struggling to
survive!!
The truth, of course, is that this deacon knew he would have to
relinquish some influence and authority once a pastor took over
and it would have probably been a 'bitter pill' for him to swallow. On one level
such deacons know a congregation will not survive without a new
incoming pastor providing some fresh impetus, but - on another
level - they fear it. This is not uncommon in many places where
there has been no pastor for some while and I believe that many
'prospective pastors' witness it. But the coldness and rudeness
was a genuine shock. I had expected to enjoy a pleasant meal in a
relaxed situation, then to meet the two or three leaders for a
private discussion. I was available as a pastor but there were
certain problems which needed to be sorted out if they wanted me
(their need of a pastor was desperate), so I was interested to
know what 'goodies' they were prepared to offer me to enable me
to consider them as a future pastorate; but instead of that, I
was subjected to quite rude behaviour. Finally, I had had enough;
I told all present that I needed to be getting home. I just
politely shook hands with the leading deacon and his wife, but my
parting from the retired pastor and his wife was very warm and
loving. It is quite obvious that they were embarrassed by what had
taken place. They didn't exactly say, 'We want to apologise
for our deacon,' yet if body language and facial expression
count for anything, they did - in a sense - apologise for
him.
Anyone reading this account who is unfamiliar with the
baptist/independent system of appointing pastors might be
genuinely astonished at the treatment I was afforded, yet I
happen to believe such things happen rather a lot within this
particular system, and that many 'prospective pastors' have
experienced such things.
There is a footnote to this story which perhaps serves to underscore that this
day was not exactly the most successful day of my life! My travelling
expenses were handed to me in an envelope. I had already agreed
with this little church that my expenses would need to be in cash
since I needed to fill my car up with petrol in order to get
home. But when I called at a garage on the way home I made a
discovery........they had underpaid my expenses by quite a big
amount! Yes, I managed to get home but only by the very skin
of my teeth with my petrol gauge on the 'red.' They contacted me
about two days later with an apology for having underpaid my
expenses (although I had not complained). I was told that a
certain sum would be sent me to cover the remainder of the
expenses, but only half of it was ever sent.
On that journey home I decided that I would never again preach
anywhere as a 'prospective pastor' and I have stuck to
that. I have often preached since, but only as a guest minister.
Yet despite everything which happened on my 'disaster day' trip
to Hampshire, it might surprise some readers when I say
that.....the Lord was very much involved in the events of that
day on my behalf.
How can I say this? Because I had prayed fervently that the
Lord would show me clearly whether it was His will for me to take
up this pastorate! MY, DID HE SHOW ME!
But the Lord showed me even more than this. He clearly showed me
that I should withdraw from the 'prospective pastor' scene since
He wasn't going to bless it.
WHAT I LEARNED FROM ALL THIS
My prospective pastor period from 1998 until 2002 taught me
several things.
I came to see that the independent/baptist system of appointing
pastors is hardly biblical and is quite flawed. The system, I
learned, could only really work where all the leaders of a
congregation were actively walking with Jesus Christ, but
where an apathetic and worldly liberalism had made serious
inroads, the system could not work. I was given a copy of
the rule book which baptist churches should apply when seeking a
pastor so I was able to see clearly for myself that the rules
were constantly either ignored or flouted.
When Paul told Titus to 'appoint elders in every city,' I
don't read any indications of the flagrant cattle market
consumerism which so often occurs; that is, that congregations
can listen to several preachers over several weeks or months then
take a vote which one they like best. At the very least, this is
often completely insensitive to the feelings of those prospective pastors. My
reading of what is supposed to happen is that (in the case of
B.U. churches), the local superintendent should only put forward
certain and very few names as prospective pastors, after much
prayer, as being most spiritually needful for a particular
congregation. But there should never be any suggestion of 'just
pick the pastor of your choice - any shape, size or
color!'
I also learned that, in practise, any pastors on some kind of
'short list' are normally never told how the whole 'pastor
required' scenario finally pans out; sometimes a congregation
decides to shelve the search for a pastor (very very common in
liberal congregations), other times a pastor does get appointed
but guest preachers who had been under consideration are not
told. I cannot see anything biblical in this whole practise.
Titus was to appoint - not allow congregations to vote
for whoever they wanted! I finally endured four years
involvement in the 'would-be pastor' circus (I hope I don't
offend anybody by my use of the word, 'circus' but it honestly
seems a pretty good word to describe what I - and others - have
witnessed).
This does not mean that I would now support hierarchial
episcopal-type church government which seems to me to be the
opposite ditch. Perhaps overall the Presbyterian system is best.
But I have an open mind, except that I have learned from
experience that the baptist/independent system often just does
not work. Nevertheless, we remain Independent non-denominational
Evangelicals.
On two occasions during this period I probably came very close to
pastoring a congregation:
1. I was invited to pastor in southern Ireland, but this was a
while after my wife and I had become Foster Carers and we were
fostering a little girl (whom we still foster at the time of writing this) and had come to
love her very much. Since southern Ireland is a separate country,
we would have had to relinquish our UK Foster Carer status and
could not have taken this little girl with us, so we both
unanimously rejected pastoring in southern Ireland.
2. The deacon of a baptist church here in the South Wales valleys
really wanted me to become their pastor after I preached there
about five times in four months; he seemed convinced that I was
the answer to their problems (they only had about 30 members),
and he was highly complementary about my preaching. This
congregation, as I recall, was not B.U.G.B. - unfortunately, however,
although he wanted me and I was certainly prepared to discuss the
possibility of becoming their pastor, he could not get the other
deacons to agree! Another odd thing I found during this period
was that some of these congregations had a large number of
deacons even with a tiny congregation! This effectively paralysed
decision-making on many many occasions which I became aware
of.
But the irony of all this is that, in a sense, everything which I
wanted to flow from the theology degree has indeed occurred; I
wanted to be fully involved in Christian ministry and since 1998
- but especially since 2001 - I have been involved in all aspects
of ministry, yet I have collected a stipend nowhere. I have
countless hours of involvement with my internet ministry;
answering questions, offering advice, praying for the sick, and
during the last year I have also shared the ministry in an
independent baptist church two miles from our home. Again, I
collect no pay, fee or stipend for doing this. I rather like this
situation since I am answerable to no man, only to our
Lord.
Robin A. Brace
2004.
"This is what you can expect when you get bold for
Christ: You can expect trouble. I mean big trouble. But you know
we are not called to please man. We're called to please God.
Folks if we're a people pleaser and we're in the pastorate, we're
in the wrong business. We ought to go to work for Avon
...."
Rev. Daniel D. Carlen - Columbia, TN, USA.
© This article is Copyright Robin A. Brace
2004 (apart from the quote by Carlen). It is forbidden to excerpt
this article without our permission. Thank you. We really regret
having to use copyright warnings but unfortunately a few
unscrupulous people have already stolen our material word for
word and claimed it as their own.
WERE YOU A "PROSPECTIVE PASTOR" WHO ALSO WITHDREW FROM THE
"PASTOR REQUIRED" SYSTEM?
E
MAIL ME HERE TO TELL ME ABOUT IT
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